From: Borge Svane Nielsen (borge@alf.nbi.dk)
Date: Tue Jul 01 2003 - 06:10:19 EDT
Hello,
A few final comments to details:
Reference 12,13,14 appear out of order. Put the NIM paper as ref 12.
Page 2 col. 2. around the IP. --> around the intersection point (IP).
Page 3 col. 1, bottom. Nbin = 897 ...
It is not clear which Nbin value goes where in Fig. 2. Needs
re-writing.
Next sentance: "For the d+Au ... 0.3." should, I think be moved to the
d+Au discussion of Fig 3.
Page 3 col 1-2. The Npart/Nbin is not very clear. How about:
Take away "The R(AuAu) .. 2GeV/c." (because participant scaling is
not yet described), then continue with:
The R(AuAu) rise from values of 0.2-0.4 at low pT to a maximum at
pT \approx 2 GeV/c. The low pT part of the spectrum is associated with
soft collisions and should therefore scale with the number of
participants, rather than Nbin. Thus the applied scaling with the
(larger) Nbin value reduces R(AuAu) to a value below 1 at the lower
pT.
Same paragraph: "... R(AuAu) at CERN-SPS .."
Is this really R(AuAu), or rather R(AA) ?
In fact, why not drop it and write:
"In fact measurements at CERN-SPS ..." because R(AA) comes later.
Page 3, col 2, middle. " ... systematic error on our reference ... -->
" ... systematic error from our reference ..."
Formula for Rcp: change * to \times
Page 3, col 2 last paragraph: psuedorapidity --> pseudorapidities
Page 4, first line: R(eta)=... Add: "shown in figure 3."
Fig 3 caption. should probably be "Ratio .. at eta=2.2 and eta=0.0 .."
Page 4, col 1. reference [22] is out of order: should be [20]
I also find that this reference is badly placed as is. The sentence
describes our data, ending with a reference to a theory paper (I
think). If we want to reference theory here, it warrants a short
sentence at the end of the paragraph, or at least a "as discussed in
[20]"
Page 4, col 2. reference [21] should go at the end of the sentence, or
at the beginning: "It has been proposed [21] ..."
Fill in reference [17] and [18]
That's it
Børge
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| Børge Svane Nielsen E-mail: borge@nbi.dk |
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